(and how they can change our lives)
Choose Your Story:
One of the most profound lessons I ever learned was from a book by Martha Beck called The Joy Diet. In that book she shared a tool in which you wrote your life story in a variety of ways – like genres. You began by writing your life as a tragedy. Then you wrote it as a comedy, and finally you wrote your life story as the Hero’s Saga – naturally with you as the hero. This exercise was so amazing to me as it showed me that I could see my own life and all of its happenings in any way that I chose – and each time I told the story from a new perspective I felt different and I saw myself differently. That, my friends, is a form of magic!! Martha’s point was to be aware that you are choosing, and to choose the story that empowers you.
Some people at this point get wrapped up in wondering what the “true” story is. You tell me – is the tragedy more true than the Hero’s Saga? Or are they just different ways to re-experience our past? We can also be very much in love with our stories and not want to see them a different way – because that means we need to see ourselves in a different light and sometimes we choose to stay with a tale that limits us or makes us a victim. (Martha calls the desire to keep telling the same story in the same way “story-fondling”, which is a pretty good name, yes?). The truly great thing about stories is we can use them – not just to share our past experiences and learn from them – but to create our now as well.
Choose Your Future:
Just as Martha suggests going through your past stories and and viewing them in new ways you can do this with your day-to-day life story. For example, when I woke up today I had choices about how to see my day ahead (my story for how today will go). I could choose to see a bunch of “have-to’s” done in succession until I fell exhausted back into bed once again. Try that story on for size …. not very inspiring, huh?! I could see my day as a comedy unfolding with funny experiences and hilarious situations. That feels better! Another option is to see my day as a fantasy story – full of magic, wonder, and curiosity about the world around me. Or I could see myself as the heroine/goddess of my own fate – overcoming fear, sloth, time constraints, and other obstacles and helping people along the way too! Very empowering stuff!! The point is, of course, it is the same list of things to do or decide, the same daily tasks, and the same life, but I choose how to tell my story so that I am in love with it – so that it serves me well. My stories can limit me or uplift me. I decide.
Does this mean you can turn a real tragedy into a comedy, or that you should try? No, absolutely not. Tragedies are a part of life in this world and somehow a vital part of our experience here. Grief, sadness, fear and anger all have their places in life. And you can obviously choose them as your perspective when you want to. And yet, I know that you can make anything better by how you choose to see it. Even grief or misery, if you see them as a valuable part of your journey through a difficult time, can bring you peace and a feeling of purpose. I know from experience that this is true. I tend to see myself as a student of life and all it holds so that when sad things happen I know that a part of it for me is learning something important and that takes my experience from meaningless and tragic to meaningful and a chance to be a better person.
Try it Out!
What type of story “lens” would you like to see your life through? By seeing yourself in a new story, in a new way, you can use your creativity, imagination, and inspiration to enhance your life. Can you heal an old misery by choosing a new perspective on it? Can you create an amazing day by seeing your self as hero of your life? Can you solve a problem or change your future by visualizing yourself as an expert? Here are a few ideas for ways to retell your story – or create the story of your life:
- Success Story
- Comedic Memoir
- Sci-Fi Story (with, or without robots!)
- Lighthearted Romance
- How-To Bestseller
- Magical Fantasy
- Inspiring Read for Entrepreneurs
- Adventure Story
- Guide to Excellent Health
- The Ultimate Self-Help Guide
- A Hero’s Story
When you write your story using a perspective that interests and excites you your eyes open to new ways of being! So, am I telling you that you can make your life whatever you want it to be? Pretty much. Will there obstacles, and problems, and difficulties, and fears – most likely. Most stories, you will notice, include these elements. It’s how the protagonist handles them that makes the difference, and that’s true for you too! And it all begins with choosing the story you really want. The one that allows you to see yourself as the person you want to be and able to inhabit the story you really want to live in. Your type of story may change from day to day and that’s totally OK (and normal), but I hope you will also be aware of what you are choosing and where that might take you. You have the power, and no matter what type of story you choose to tell you are the HERO!
Happy story telling!! I’d love to hear yours! Send me an email at firstname.lastname@example.org. You can also sign up for my emails and a free course about creating altars to clarify and attract your best life.
All the best!