The short version of this tool is – check in with your heart, especially when you aren’t sure. OK, go forth! But seriously, this is a practice that I use all day and every day now. It’s so ingrained that I didn’t even think of it as a “tool” when I was coming up with ideas for this series (Simple Tools for Changing Times), but it’s probably my most helpful practice of all. Your heart knows…as they say! And that is true. When you listen to your heart you’re in alignment with your values, and needs, and your true Self. It took some practice when I first began to be able to feel clearly what my heart was saying, and also to remember to actually check in.
Here are a few tips to help you to hear your heart.
Why: This tool helps you to know yourself better. It will assist you in embracing your desires, caring for your needs, and allow you to really enjoy your life! Your body and your heart know what is truly needed and desired. Your mind will get busy, confused, and lost in stories. We all have lots of “rules” and reasons for not doing what’s in our best, most joyful (and healthiest) interest, but your heart only wants you to live a life of love and joy. It’s also a great way to get clear on things that are hard to “figure out”. I love to use it for decisions – the more immediate and important the better information you’ll get.
What: I’m talking about a practice of checking in with yourself regularly and using the sensations around your heart area to let you know when you’re “on track” for you. You simply get quiet, look inside, and be aware of the feelings in your heart area. For example, when something is “right” for me I feel a softness, expansion, warmth, and a glow around my heart area. I may see a glow in my mind’s eye too. I may smile (I often smile if it’s really a good idea!), my shoulders may drop and relax, I straighten up my body, I feel expansive and lighter.
Your sensations could be different than mine, though a sense of expansion is the most common description. A way to check this is to think of something absolutely wonderful about your life now and see how your heart feels about that. This tells you your own language of the heart. Conversely, something that doesn’t feel good to your heart tends to show up as contraction, clenching, tightness, folding in (shoulders bent, etc.), tightness of breath, and even discomfort in your throat and/or stomach areas. If your heart is neutral about something that will feel, well, neutral, in your body too.
When: I use this tool all day long. It’s perfect for having a quick check in to see how you’re really doing right now. I like to make sure I’m on track with my internal wisdom. We often get all bundled up in what’s happening and forget to stop and look inside. There’s wisdom there! And the encouragement to pause and look inward, just for a moment even, makes for a much more delightful day. Plus, it feels really GOOD when your heart is happy! I want more of that!
My favorite way to use this tool is for decisions that I’m confused or distressed about. My head can go ‘round and ‘round a subject and make me crazy! But my heart generally has a good idea about what I truly want and need. I also may ask for assistance with this. You can ask your higher Self, an angel, God, or any guide to help you to understand what you are hearing, and to hear truly. Getting clear on a decision may take some practice and require quiet time and focus. The best way for me is to ask, sense, and then write – as I often get more information that way. As I write, I’ll keep checking in to make sure I’m still listening to my heart.
The responses you get aren’t really yes” or “no” answers, though sometimes you may use them that way. They tell you what is in alignment with your spirit or soul. You can do anything you choose, this is just more information to help you. I prefer to go with my heart and have made a commitment to that, but still there are times that I don’t. And following your heart may just mean finding a new approach, or altering your thinking about something and making it work for you. I may just keep making shifts or trying new ideas until it all feels “right”. This isn’t about rules or “shoulds”, but about honoring yourself and being open to what you desire and need to live a delicious and meaningful life.
Wishing you love, clarity, and lots of pleasure in this season of the heart! Drop me a line with questions or comments at firstname.lastname@example.org (or look here). If you have a question or want more help with this practice you can go here and schedule a free 20 minute session and we’ll work on it together!